In a prime-time address, President Bush said he backed limited federal funding for stem cell research. 'That's right', the President said, this is a quote, 'the research could help cure brain diseases like Alzheimer's, Parkinson's, and whatever it is I have'. - Conan O'Brien, Talkshow Host
A team of researchers based at the Health and Safety Laboratory in Buxton, Derbyshire have spent a month and £12,000 of taxpayers money investigating The Role of Towels as a Control to Reduce Slip Potential in the hope that, at the end of their study, they could could reach a conclusion on the weighty matter of whether or not to use a towel to step onto after bathing. Unfortunately, the research was 'complicated' and they couldn't come up with any significant results.
Research that did come up with results was that done for child trust fund provider Family Investments. 530 women with young children were interviewed about their pregnancies and it was found that just 22 per cent of due dates had been accurate to within 2 days. A consultant commented, 'There are a huge number of births that are overdue.' I'm not sure what the point of this research was but it was stated that 'pinpointing an exact due date can relieve anxiety for families, wrongly predicted dates can cause difficulties in the planning, such as booking maternity and paternity leave.' It's amazing that no-one has yet claimed compensation for not being given a precise date! I didn't realise that this was a subject that needed research. I thought EVERYONE knew that babies arrived just when they wanted to and not according to plan!