Where's Noah when you need him?

I am at two with nature - Woody Allen

After checking out the weather earlier and deciding that the garden was no place to be, I sort of stood for a while gazing out at the unremitting rain, thinking of nothing in particular. After some moments a tune, together with a few words, crept into my head: rain, rain, rain - rain, rain, rain - rain, rain, rain, r...ain (aren't lyrics uninspiring when just written down, like this?) Of course, it's the chorus to Didnt It Rain, popular in the far-off days of my childhood. Then came the problem - who recorded it? I convinced myself that it was The Deep River Boys but thought I'd better check it out, just in case. Appears I was wrong and it was the great Frankie Laine, who sadly died last February. Same era though.

(Incidentally, whilst checking out The Deep River Boys, I noticed a list of groups in the same genre one of which was called 'The Brown Dots'. Would that name be allowed today? Or even 'The Inkspots'?)

With nothing better to do I set myself to exercise my tired old brain by think of all songs about rain, without resorting to Google, unless desperate.

First up was this: - and yes I did Google for the picture

2. It Might As Well Rain Until September - Carole King
3. It's Raining in my Heart - Buddy Holly
4. Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head - ?Burt Bacharach
5. Rainy Days and Mondays - The Carpenters
6. Just Walking in the Rain - Johnnie Ray
7. Rainy Night in Georgia - Randy Crawford
8. I Can't Stand the Rain - Tina Turner
9. Come Rain or Come Shine - loads of people, including Billie Holiday, Rosemary Clooney, Ella Fitzgerald, Frank Sinatra
10. The Day That the Rains Came Down - Jane Morgan
11. It's Raining Men - Weather Girls
12. Listen to the Rhythm of the Falling Rain - ??
13. Somewhere Over the Rainbow - the little girl, aged 6, whose name I can't remember, who didn't win that talent show that was on the other day
14. September in the Rain - Frank Sinatra
15. Sing a Rainbow - ??
16. Raindrops on Roses - Julie Andrews
17. Here Comes the Rain Again - The Eurythmics
18. Purple Rain - Prince
19. Laughter in the Rain - Neil Sedaka
20. It Never Rains in Southern California - ??

Well that's it - bet there's loads more. Perhaps the brain is still working.

Check this out

Got this from As a Dodo. It's a bit long but worth sticking with if only for the very end sentiment.

We've also got a BBC documentary about Cherie's life at Downing Street to look forward to. No doubt we'll find out how misunderstood she was and, at heart, she's a pretty straight sorta gal.

Ho hum.

It's HOW MUCH??????

Money talks........... but all mine ever says is 'goodbye' - anon
Back to the vet's today. Results of blood tests. Final check-up. Nothing AT ALL wrong with cat. In fact in very good nick for his age. Thank you.

That'll be £210 pounds, please. Gulp.

Peep Bo

I've come back out of hiding. The cat started to perk up about 5 minutes before we were due to leave for the appointment with the vet and by the time we got there he was ready, claws drawn.

She couldn't find much wrong with him except for a raised temperature and came to the conclusion that he was 'under the weather'. So he had an injection and we've got to go back tomorrow.

It's my turn now to cover my eyes and someone else can go and hide!

No title required

When I came down to breakfast David said 'Haven't seen any sign of Mitch'.

Now this is very, very unusual because for a cat who likes to eat every hour, or so it seems, after a night without sustenance breakfast is the meal he can hardly wait for. When he hadn't appeared by 10.30 I went looking for him (in very heavy rain) and found him sitting under a tree at the bottom of the garden, appearing to not really be aware of his surroundings. I persuaded him to follow me back indoors where he wandered about a bit and then made for the sofa where he is now. It is very obvious to me that all is not well.

I've phoned the vet and have an appointment at 3.05 and I'm not looking forward to the outcome.

I haven't liked 2007 very much so far. I want to run way and hide ....again.

Ah, The Shed

He looked about as inconspicuous as a tarantula on a slice of angel food - Raymond Chandler

In her comment on my previous post, Jo pointed out the error of my ways in not including her visit yesterday and the inspection of the New Shed which, from this point forward, I will call 'Ottilie'. You see, where we once had fairies at the bottom of our garden, we now have Ottilie. She is an attractive shade of green and is very inconspicuous.

Ottilie was born out of the need for Ottershaw Players to find a new home for their costumes and I agreed to be the midwife and adoptive mother. Now all that is needed is to decant the stuff that has accumulated over more years than anyone cares to remember from Joan's loft to Ottilie's cosy interior.

Like this only green and bigger - --------------------------------------

A day in the life of................

The ordinary acts we practice every day at home are of more importance to the soul than their simplicity might suggest - Thomas Moore (no, not my grandson aged 11 but the chap who lived from 1779-1852)



See, one of the reasons I'm not prolific with my blogging is that it isn't often I come across things to write about which will interest and amuse anyone who might want to read my offerings without being bored to death. So I've set myself a challenge to describe my day in an interesting and amusing manner and any of you that die............ well, it comes to us all eventually.



Didn't make it into the garden today because having discovered during my morning ablutions that we were down to the last roll of loo paper and then the cat had to make do with dried food (meoughw), thought I'd better charge up my ipod shuffle (imperative for me to listen to Barry Manilow whilst grocery shopping) and make my way to Woking, where I could buy some cheap t-shirts in Primark and then head on over to Morrisons, a supermarket that I want to try out as various people have told me that their prices are very reasonable.

Woking isn't a great metropolis. It isn't as good as Kingston or Guildford but much, much better than Chertsey and the other small, local towns. I managed to make my way through the bustling shoppers without getting my bum pinched like MaryB and, to my delight, discovered that a Farmer's Market was being held in the town square. Bought plants, a pie, a couple of goat's cheeses and would have bought a delicious looking strawberry tart if the guy serving could have found a gap in his phone conversation about going to the pub tonight to serve me.

Dived into New Look as they had 20% off of everything. I'm getting used to the strange looks I get from the 16-year-olds who work in there at this overweight old lady rummaging through the rails. Perhaps they think I'm shopping for my granddaughter.

I like to treat going to the check-out in Primark as a sort of game. The idea is to look at the price tickets on whatever you've bought and then try to guess how much you'll be charged (it's always less). For example, today I bought 2 t-shirts priced at £4 each, the girl scanned them and said '£5 please'. Happens nearly every time.

Uneventful (except stopping off to buy 8 Millies Cookies for later) return to the car park and then on to the supermarket where I did super-big shop for food, groceries and a few other essentials (and some non-essentials). Pleasantly surprised when the bill came to only (??) £160 as I truly was expecting much more. (I never, ever thought I'd find myself saying only £160 when shopping for food!)

A Few Random Thoughts on Supermarket Shopping - why do people have to stop at the end of aisles to check their shopping lists/talk to their friends, etc. so that there's no room to pass?
are they the same people who have to stand smack bang in the centre of the aisle, usually bending down, while they spend ages trying to decide which brand of baked beans or whatever they are going to buy?
in the car park do drivers think that they are still protected by their vehicle as they make their way to/from their cars on foot or do they have a death wish?
why do some people start to queue at the check-out before they've actually finished their shopping, leaving their trolley to save their place while they nip around for stuff they've forgotten?

Anyway, back home, fill up the fridge and the cupboards, feed the cat on stuff he actually likes (why don't they make mouse flavoured cat food?) and pick up Thomas from school. I'm reminded of something he said the other day: "Is the word for someone who doesn't believe in God an 'orthodontist'?"

Quick check of emails, note that I've got one 'comment' and a few requests for stuff that I've put on the Freecycle website and then a quick look at my favourite blogs. Liked a piece on Colin Campbell's blog about condoms fitted with vibrating rings being sold in India and the Indians getting shirty because they have been described as 'sex toys'. Colin reckons that soon they'll be fitted with 'romantic ring tones'! How about Everything's Coming up Roses?

Whilst loading the dishwasher I managed to spill some cooking oil on the floor without noticing and then stood in it. Luckily I managed not to break my neck and mopped it up. I must say that it left quite a shine on the laminate but remained quite slippery. I did toy with the idea of leaving it as it was and then luring David into doing a Torvill & Dean routine with Bolero being played on a vibrating condom but then thought better of it!!

That's about it really. Can't make dozing off in front of the telly sound very interesting or amusing and now my day is nearly over. So night, night everyone. Hope you're not too bored (or dead).

PS The cat's got his revenge - half a chewed fish and a mouse on the back doorstep

Almost everything in the garden's lovely

When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant. ~Author Unknown

I believe I mentioned yesterday that my project this year is to DEFINITELY get my garden under control. When I left work, which was in 1999, I imagined that I would spend all my time in the garden. Then I discovered amdram and Ottershaw Players and, well, where does the time go? But I am determined. No more shilly shallying, every spare minute is being spent chopping, pruning, digging, weeding. Some of the results you can see above and some of what's left to do is below.

I've done about a quarter of it now (and they was the easier bits) so there's still a way to go. But armed with my ipod and a variety of audio books I must say I'm having a really good time.

Today my entertainment was Bill Bryson's Life & Times of the Thunderbolt Kid. Great storytelling and so evocative of how the world used to be and growing up in the fifties. Good stuff.

Tomorrow it's going to be Billy Connolly (OK, so it's not a book but it'll make me laugh) and Ned Sherrin's autobiography, which will also probably make me laugh.

Now to dig the dirt from under my nails, have a relaxing shower and then I'll just about be ready for a nice glass of Chianti.

Cheers!!

It's been a long, long time

OK - so I haven't been around for a while - but I have been keeping an eye on you all.

Pete's wonderful production of Whose Life is it Anyway? kept me on my toes and I've made 'getting my garden back into shape' my project for this year. Then there's Jo's garden and Pete & Kath's new house and garden to think about, although I haven't given them as much time as I would have liked.

But mainly I've been a bit pre-occupied for the past few months. You know, you're jogging along nicely, living your life, having a laugh, having a moan, planning stuff. Then out of this everyday ordinariness something leaps out and kicks you in the teeth, or bites you in the bum, or makes you want to run away and hide which you don't do because that wouldn't help anybody, would it? Anyway, we had some news that knocked me for six so I haven't been able to do anything that requires too much concentration or thought. Things are looking brighter now and, hopefully, the problem will be cleared up before too much longer.

Today I've booked tickets to see Chicago and Slava's Snowshow in September. If you haven't seen the Snowshow I can thoroughly recommend it, although it's hard to describe. It's mainly clowns, lots of small pieces of paper and HUGE balloons!! and as for Chicago - well, who can resist all that jazz!!!!!

How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next, you forget to pull your zipper up and finally you forget to pull it down - George Burns


Once upon a time, a long, long time ago (well, last August, actually), the lovely and talented Maryb told us all about this book. Obviously it was a 'must read' so I rushed out and bought it immediately. 'Rushed out' in this case is a bit strong; I ordered it online from Amazon. The book duly arrived, I unpacked it and put it on the top of my pile of books to read, intending to dip into it at the earliest opportunity. Over the course of the next few months it occurred to me every now and then that I couldn't recall seeing the book where I'd left it and I must make an extra effort to seek it out and read it, especially Mary's bit. Usually this thought came to me at 'inconvenient for searching' moments, e.g. whilst I was shopping in Sainsbury's, driving on the M25 and by the time I was in any position to do so I'd forgotten all about it.

A few days ago, confined to the house with the coughs and sneezes, my head cleared long enough to recall my mission to FIND THE BOOK. It wasn't where I'd put it, it wasn't on the bookshelves, it wasn't anywhere. I seriously began to think that I hadn't ordered it at all! Then...........this morning.................Eureka!!!!! It was lurking in the bag that I carry all of my Ottershaw Players' stuff around in and which has been in regular, constant use since October, if not before. Is there any hope left for me, d'you think?

What a great book and well worth the long wait. Congratulations on your story, Mary; so wonderfully evocative of childhood.

Now where did I put that damn book???????????

The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time. - Friedrich Nietzsche

****************************************************************

May I introduce you to Mitch:

"I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "where is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
"Cats," he said eventually. "Cats are nice." - Terry Pratchett (Sourcery).

The ice age cometh

After a lazy 'getting up late' sort of start to the day, still trying to shake off this bloody awful cold (pass the AirBorne, MaryB), and thinking that the wet sounds of the cars taking the unlucky ones to work/school was caused by the usual rain, I actually exclaimed out loud when I pulled the curtains and saw the winterland in front of me. Even the building site which is the bungalow opposite us looked quite pretty with its covering of the white stuff.

Wish I'd got up earlier, though, 'cos it was thawing fast. I scrabbled about finding my camera, then finding new batteries. Why do they always run out when you want to do something spontaneous?

Anyway manged to get these and a couple more, which are on Flickr if you're interested.

It's now about 45 minutes since I took these and the garden is almost back to its usual weedy green.

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Was doing a bit of 'blurfing' last night to see what I could find and found Colin Campbell, well worth a regular read, I think. Colin led me on to find this: Beau Bo D’Or » Blog Archive » GoldenBalls for Golden Globes . Another great site for your 'not watching rubbish on the telly' time.

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Apparently an American company has come up with the idea of emails which self-destruct after being read once. It cannot be forwarded, copied or edited and the names of the sender and receiver vanish forever. You can join the cast of Mission Impossible for a mere £20 a year. I can see all sorts of shenanigans ahead.

Hair today, .....

I have to be at the hairdressers' in about 20 minutes. Have just looked out of the window and am now wondering if it's worth it - or shall I just go and tip my money in the conveniently placed drain in the road just by my driveway?

For those of you who don't live here we are currently experiencing 'severe' weather across the country: rain, gale force winds, more rain, followed by more winds. The unbrella is definitely not going to be used!

A love story.

Here's a page from my 2007 diary, which I thought I'd share with you. I tried to make it bigger so that you could more easily read it but, not being very clever, I couldn't. So I'll reproduce the text here:

CHOCOLATE: You want me Lady don't you?
You want me! You WANT ME!

LADY: No Chocolate, I do not want you, for after the
initial pleasure there is SICKNESS and there is
GUILT.

CHOCOLATE: That, Lady is the REASON FOR MY EXISTENCE.
Are you to deny me the REASON FOR MY
EXISTENCE?

LADY: No, Chocolate. I would not do that.

CHOCOLATE: Thank you.

(A munching sound is heard, followed by a sigh of pleasure.)

Gordon Ramsey - you know nothing

It's my turn to host our weekly Mahjong get-together tonight. Being a good hostess (and because the others always dish up mouth-watering nibbles, probably purchased from Marks & Spencer), I had to turn my mind today towards thoughts of what I was going to impress my friends with. Yesterday I was going to buy a few carrots, a cucumber, some crisps or suchlike, some dips and do my own version of Ready, Steady, Cook just before they arrived.

Anyhow, things didn't go according to plan, mainly because I seem to have developed a condition called tescoitis a symptom of which is memory loss brought on by my desire to get out of the place as quickly as possible. Luckily I remembered the cat food.

So....... this morning I thought, 'I know, I'll impress them, I'll bake a cake'. I have this geat recipe where you put all of the ingredients except the flour into a saucepan and boil them, then add the flour, then put in the oven for an hour. Piece of cake!

Now, I quite like baking when I'm in the mood (a bit like knitting) but I haven't been in the mood for some time now so I thought it wise to check the 'best by' dates on the flour; didn't want one of my friends calling a 'pung' then passing out. An hour and one big black bin bag later my cupboard was bare apart from a packet of raisins with still a month to go.

Out had gone not only the flour but several small jars of herbs and spices, baking powder, cup-a-soups, gravy granules and even a couple of bars of cooking chocolate! I'm glad they haven't started the 'pay for your bin collection by weight' scheme yet.

Then came the quandary - where do I go for the replacements? Tesco, or even Sainsbury, they're both not my shops of choice, especially on a Friday. I'd get in there, have a bit of memory loss, and who knows what I'd come out with!! Luckily there are one or two small convenience stores not too far away, one of which is near a 'proper' butchers, so I could deal with Sunday lunch at the same time. Bought my ingredients, had a nice chat and a laugh about binmen with the lady serving me, didn't forget anything. Came home, made the cake.

Then I thought I'd make some flapjacks, as a healthy option. They must be, they've got all of those oats in them, doesn't matter about the sugar, then more sugar in syrup form holding the oats together.

So here I am passing time waiting for my friends to arrive and anticipating that moment when it's time for a break and I can bring out my creations. Oh the feeling of superiority when answering the question, 'These are delicious, did you make them yourself?' I can truthfully answer: 'Yes'.

And here endeth the lesson

versus

My friend, Judy, sent me this:

In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, with green, yellow and red vegetables of all kinds so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Dairy Ice Cream and Magnums. And Satan said "You want hot fudge with that? And Man said "Yes!" And Woman said "I'll have one too with chocolate chips". And lo they gained 10 pounds.

And God created the healthy yoghurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 12 to size 14.

So God said "Try my fresh green salad".

And Satan presented Blue Cheese dressing and garlic croutons on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said "I have sent you healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them".

And Satan brought forth deep fried coconut king prawns, butter-dipped lobster chunks and chicken fried steak, so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol went through the roof.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition.

Then Satan peeled off the healthy skin and sliced the starchy centre into chips and deep fried them in animal fats adding copious quantities of salt. And Man put on more pounds.

God then brought forth running shoes so that his Children might lose those extra pounds.

And Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretch jogging suits.

Then God gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.

And Satan created McDonalds and the 99p double cheeseburger. Then Satan said "You want fries with that?" and Man replied "Yes, And super size 'em". And Satan said "It is good." And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple by-pass surgery.

And then Satan chuckled and created the National Health Service.

THE FINAL WORD ON NUTRITION: After an exhaustive review of the research literature, here's the final word on nutrition and health.:

Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.

Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.

Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.



CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

This one's for you....

This post is dedicated to all of those people out there who, like me, are constantly having to deal with banks, inconsiderate drivers, bad-mannered shop staff, call centres, service engineers who turn up late (if at all!), doctors' receptionists, gangs of 'yoofs' who play football in the middle of a busy road, Tony Blair, and his government, political correctness, health & safety, etc., etc., etc.

These boots were made for walking....

This is the Copper Horse on Snow Hill, and the view north along The Long Walk towards Windsor Castle and the George IV gateway. The gent sitting on the horse, dressed as a Roman, is King George lll.






And this is the aforementioned Long Walk, built in 1688, again looking towards the Castle for a distance of 3 miles.



I'm sharing these fascinating details with you in the hope that you will be overwhelmingly impressed that today Jo and I decided to get some fresh air by walking it. As there is no car park right next to King George, we had a fair old uphill walk to the start of our trek (about half a mile), followed by the previously referenced 3 miles to Her Majesty's front door. Time now for a spot of lunch, so into the town (not far) and then, after a well-deserved break, time to head back.

By way of a change, we decided to go back by a different route and set off up the road leading through Windsor Great Park to the car park. It was round about now that it crossed my mind 'perhaps we've bitten off more than we can chew'. This feeling strengthened as the footpath ended and we were obliged to walk on soggy, lumpy grass with mini quagmires every now and then. Is there still a hosepipe ban?? (I hope you haven't forgotten that the distance left to cover is about 3 miles!!) We soldiered on (not much else we could do at that stage) and eventually staggered to the car where we eased ourselves onto the seats, because the legs refused to bend at the knees, feeling a wonderful sense of achievement! Yes, it's made me determined to explore all of our local parks, gardens and countryside on foot and a lot more often than I have done recently.

As a postscript, you will notice that the bloke on the horse is pointing west towards the woods, precisely in the direction to where I lost my glasses. If only he could speak because I'm sure that from his great height he knows exactly where they are!

It's only words........

"I don't see much sense in that," said Rabbit.
"No," said Pooh humbly, "there isn't. But there was going to be when I began it. It's just that something happened to it along the way."

Words that I like:

• Compendium
• bizarre
• weird
• connotation
• rummage
• bibliograph
• jingle
• frolic
• perception
• extravagance
• perambulation
• vehicular

Words I don't like:

• vagaries
• bell
• brochure
• bulldog
• exercise-book
• tumble
• saxaphone
• straight
• cafetiere

Here are some old words no longer in common use:

bablatrice - a female babbler
chaterestre - a talkative woman
erinaceous - like a hedgehog; a person with prickly manners
deuterogamist - someone who marries a second time
dictioneer - person who takes it upon themselves to criticise diction or writing style
finnimbrun - a knickknack or trinket
flagitation - asking or demanding with passion; begging
funambulist - a tightrope walker; a person who thinks quickly on their feet
heterarchy - government by strangers or foreigners, literally "rule of an alien"
hibernacle - winter home of hibernating animal; a sunshine retreat for people
leighster - a female liar
loranthaceous - related to mistletoe family; kisses given or received under the mistletoe
lordswike - a person who deceives their boss; a traitor
mouton enrage - an angry person who is usually calm, literally "mad sheep"
nullo - someone who has undergone an elective amputation for the purposes of body modification, usually of a toe
rhinarium - the hairless and moist nose of some mammals
snollygoster - a dishonest politician, especially a shrewd or calculating one
solfeggist - someone who sings notes using do, re, mi, fa, sol, la and ti woofits - an unwell feeling, especially a headache; a moody depression; a hangover.

My favourite is loranthaceous although I don't think I'll be using it often. Now, snollygoster will be in constant use!

Going to bed now 'cos I've got a touch of the Woofits.

By the way, I get unreasonably wound up by people who pronounce the word 'aitch' as 'haitch'.

The party's over......

Well, that's it for another year then - Christmas, birthday and New Year all over and done with. Perm any two out of the three and you're bound to find that at least one of these celebrations could be described as enjoyable. Whoopee - jackpot time - they were ALL great!!

Christmas started a bit differently in our house this year because Jo decided that she wanted to wake up in her own home with Thomas on Christmas morning so that meant we weren' t comitted to staying up on Christmas Eve until the early hours waiting for Thomas to go to sleep so that Santa could deliver his presents. But it was very, very, very quiet in the absence of childhood anticipation.

The cat obviously thought we were a bit sad so he thought he'd cheer us up by inviting his little furry friend in for a game of football. This was a surprise because we'd rigged the cat-flap so that he couldn't work it if he had any of the local wildlife in his mouth but he'd used his feline inventiveness (after about 5 years!) to overcome this problem. He's very thoughtful, is Mitch. During my recent involvement with Ottershaw Players' production of The Wind in the Willows I would often arrive home late at night to find Ratty or one of his family waiting on the back doorstep to offer advice. Usually they had found the wait too tedious and had died of boredom. The cat looked much too innocent to have wished them any harm.

Christmas morning arrived at last, the turkey (which we were very lucky to have, because when the butcher said he was open for 2 or 3 hours on Christmas Eve for collection of said bird he didn't mention that he started at 6am!) fitted well into the oven, Jo was bringing the vegetables, Kathleen was bringing the pudding, Thomas was bringing himself!! Lunch was almost on time and voted to be one of the best ever, I think. Present opening lasted throughout the day, thereby proving just how grown up Thomas is getting. Wonderfully hilarious end to the day with a challenging game of Balderdash. Not laughed as much for hours.

Boxing Day was a blur of bacon bagels for breakfast, followed by regular snacks throughout the day of all the fruit, nuts, chocolates, drinks, etc bought especially for the occasion. Of course we also had the turkey to finish up, ham, salad, cheeses, etc, etc. For exercise we had a walk round the block and up to 'the ruins', where Pete took some photos and reminisced about his childhood.

There then followed a brief hiatus of a couple of days (spent not doing very much at all) before my birthday celebrations. Although it wasn't a 'special' one with no zero on the end or anything, I was having TWO restaurant outings. This was all thanks to Pete who was off, on my birthday, to spend New Year in Lincolnshire. So we had a family meal at a local Indian restaurant and then the next evening it was scrummy Italian food with two good friends.

What should have been two relaxed, enjoyable evenings were spoilt by ***NOISE***. Now, I'm no killjoy and am usually happy to see others having a good time. But I'm also out to have a good time with my companions and really don't want to be forced to be included in someone else's idea of having fun or even excluded from having any fun at all. I've also noticed that a growing number of restaurants are being refitted/furnished with lots of hard surfaces (stone floors, no soft furnishings, table linens, etc.) and therefore noise is not absorbed. After that massive moan about my birthday I'll just have to make it a priority to find a little intimate restaurant locally and do it all over again!

New Year was spent, as always, with the lovely David; very low key, watching Jools Holland and his guests on TV and thanking our lucky stars that these days we're not forced to watch people in kilts playing bagpipes. (OK Jools did have men in kilts playing bagpipes but they weren't on for long and I hid behind my drink).

So now back to normal, whatever normal is.

This morning I had to shop for a few essential bits and pieces, because food bought for Christmas doesn't last forever, and had to make a momentous decision: will it be Sainsburys in Chertsey or Tesco in Addlestone? I don't like going to Chertsey on Tuesdays because the local auction house holds its weekly sale and car park is full of white vans and their men. As you may have gathered from previous posts and comments I HATE Tesco but it's easier to park there so I went for that option. BIG MISTAKE. I realised that mistake as soon as I entered the car park, passing four spaces where because other people had parked so badly nobody else could take advantage of the gap. To be honest I thought I'd entered some sort of time warp and I was in pre-Christmas mayhem again. But no, just the everyday mayhem that's the joy of Tesco in Addlestone. Luckily Jo phoned while I was in there and suggested lunch at the pub so that was a good excuse to get out of there at double speed. New Year resolution: never going in there again.

I was sorely tempted to buy a limited edition plastic filter water jug. They may be antiques of the future. Who knows in a few years it might be worth something (yeah, 10p I hear you say). How many, do you think, did they limit them to? This Tesco had a big display stand full of them and I bet all the other Tesco shops have too.

Got to go now as I've just spilled half a glass of red wine down my cleavage, the cat's giving me a funny look and NYPD is on the telly.

Photo Hunt Blogroll

2007

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! to everyone - here's hoping 2007 is everything you want it to be.

Random thoughts....

1. Don't wear a silky scarf/shawl with a leather coat whilst carrying a couple of carrier bags, a handbag and an umbrella. It will slide about, trail on the floor fall off altogether and you will:

a) fall over

b) strangle yourself

c) assault fellow shoppers with said bags, umbrella, etc whilst trying to retrieve it

d) look stupid

You will NOT look serene, elegant or even sane.

2. Does anyone else find it puzzling that you find a newspaper/magazine article about the national problem with obesity in children but a few pages on there is another piece about the bad example being set by too thin models, actresses, etc. to said children. You will also frequently find pictures of various models, actresses, etc., who to me look fairly normal, showing their (whisper this please) cellulite and comments about them getting 'fat'.

3. Why do security lights on houses that you are NOT visiting come on when you pass by on the other side of the road but those on houses that you ARE visiting don't work unless you jump up and down waving your arms about, all in order to see the step/doorbell.

4. Why can't all parking ticket machines give change? Some do but others don't and seem to be proud to tell you so. Of course, I know the reason for it; just another little ploy for councils to get your money but then tell you they're so poor they can't keep the streets properly clean.

5. I've noticed recently an ever-increasing concern about my whereabouts. I'll be browsing the shelves/rails of a shop and suddenly a voice will say in my ear 'You alright there?' Even the girl shampooing my hair asks me, although I can't think where else I could be in that situation. Perhaps next time I'll answer 'Well, no, actually, - I'd much rather be on a sun-kissed beach in Bermuda'.

6. We seem to be inundated with endless '100 Best whatever' TV programmes recently. I', waiting for the '100 Best Weather Forecasts'. Riveting stuff!!

Blogging off!!!

If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.

I haven't posted for over a month now. This is because I've been living, breathing Ottershaw Players and Wind in the Willows. Oh, and I did go on holiday to Florida for a couple of weeks.

The 200 posters and 3000 flyers have all been distributed and the phone has been ringing with ticket orders although not enough. The Saturday matinee is sold out but all of the evening performances need a few more people in the audience.

Today we did a costume and makeup check followed by a runthrough of the play. The costumes looked great, only a few minor adjustments to make and only one person without anything to wear. (A naked weasel? Well why not?? I think the Festival play that I did costumes for recently is having a strange influence on my judgement!). So it seems that the endless hours spent searching charity shops, buying materials, hunched over a sewing machine (my chiropractor is doing well!), trying on, discarding, trying again, phoning to beg or borrow have all been worthwhile.

My house badly needs cleaning but I'm working on my own interpretation of the Quentin Crisp principle that after the first four years the dust doesn't get any worse; I'm making it the first inch. The fridge is always empty and meals are basic, to say the least. And I'm still trying to catch up on the laundry from my holiday.

How does she find the time to write this?, I sense you are thinking. BECAUSE I CAN'T SLEEP. Which is very annoying because I am tired.

I do want all of my friends to know, however, that I have been regularly reading their posts so that I can keep up to date.

Four o'clock now and I have to be out and about tomorrow finding a suit for a naked weasel so perhaps I'd better try again for those zzzzzzzzzz's

Hello...........

Just want to let any interested party know that I AM still around. I have been keeping up to date by reading all of your posts and making the odd comment or two, but I've been so busy with naked men, policemen, toads, rats, moles, badgers, weasels, Albert the Horse, bargewomen, washerwomen, hedgehogs, rabbits, gypsies, etc. and the end isn't imminent!

AND I'm going on holiday next Monday for two weeks!

So more regular blogging soon.

Makeover

You may have noticed that I have updated my image. This is because:

1. My hair colour is changing
2. It shows my propensity for raiding the fridge
3. My dress sense is much more apparent

Well, doesn't time fly.....

September 14th 1963


We had our anniversary dinner last night (David's busy tonight). Went to the Rose and Crown on Thorpe Green. Very nice.

The meal ended with coffee and a mint chocolate called 'Twilight'. This made me think of The Twilight Zone and the only episode I ever saw which was the one with William Shatner (I think) in a plane, in turbulence, looking out of the window and seeing a figure dancing on the wing. This scene has stuck in my mind ever since and now I can't fly at night without constantly glancing out of the window to see what I can see.

After doing a bit of research I've discovered that, apart from Mary Ann Fischer giving birth to 4 girls and a boy in South Dakota, nothing else of any importance whatsoever happened on that day. We had it all to ourselves.

Following a very disappointing summer the weather was fantastic catching unawares all of the ladies who had bought winter-weight outfits and sweltered throughout the day. The service went according to plan except the bit where the vicar says 'Who giveth this woman?' and my Dad (who was a bit of a rough diamond), who was more nervous than I, stepped forward, grabbed my arm and said 'Here y'are, mate'. Which wasn't too awful. (I think later on that evening at the reception, after we had left for our honeymoon, he fell down the stairs but was so drunk that he didn't hurt himself at all).

We set off for our honeymoon in the late afternoon, heading for Coombe Martin in Devon. Please bear in mind that this was pre-motorway times and the time it took to get to the West Country then was similar to the time it takes to get to America today! We therefore had an overnight stop at The Red Lion in Salisbury, a place where you'd just nip out to for a Sunday lunch these days. A blissful week in Devon followed and it's been uphill ever since - perhaps with a few stiles and gates to slow us down on the way.

1963:

The Birds (1963), D: Alfred Hitchcock
Charade (1963), D: Stanley Donen
Cleopatra (1963), D: Joseph L. Mankiewicz
From Russia With Love (1963), D: Terence Young
The Great Escape (1963), D: John Sturges
The Haunting (1963), D: Robert Wise
How the West Was Won (1963), D: John Ford, Henry Hathaway, George Marshall
Hud (1963), D: Martin Ritt
It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World (1963), D: Stanley Kramer
Lilies of the Field (1963), D: Ralph Nelson
Tom Jones (1963), D: Tony Richardson

Born: Johnny Depp, Whitney Houston, Mike Myers, Lisa Kudrow
Died: Aldous Huxley, CS Lewis, JF Kennedy (all on 22nd November!!), Pope John XXIII

Some other things:

• Nyasaland (now Malawi) becomes self-governing under Dr Hastings Banda
• First flight of Boeing 747
• Beatlemania
• Alcatraz closed
• John Profumo denies having sex with Christine Keeler
• NYC's newspapers end a 114 days strike
• Jack Nicklaus wins 27th Golf Masters
• 35th Academy Awards: Lawrence of Arabia, Ann Bancroft, Gregory Peck
• Decca signs Rolling Stones on advice from Beatles
• Princess Alexandra marries Angus Ogilvie
• US carries out several nuclear tests
• 17th Annual Tony Awards: Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf and A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum
• Martin Luther King delivers his 'I have a dream' speech
• Bob Dylan does a few rebelious things (eg. walking out of a TV show)
• Record of the Year: "I Left My Heart in San Francisco," Tony Bennett
• Album of the Year: The First Family, Vaughn Meader (Cadence)
• Song of the Year: "What Kind of Fool Am I," Leslie Bricusse and Anthony Newley, songwriters
• John Profumo resigns over affair with Christine Keeler

I dedicate this post to my lovely husband (who is a complete luddite and technophobe so he'll never see it!)

Don't bank on it!!!

I’m astounded…shocked…flabbergasted…gobsmacked….

Today we received a rather large cheque in the post (somewhere between questions 9 & 10 on Who Wants to be a Millionaire), the proceeds of a savings bond. Along I go the our bank, fill in the paying-in slip hand it to the cashier who looks at it, looks at me and says:

‘You do want to pay this into this account?’
‘Yes’
‘You do have plans or a specific purpose for it, then?’
‘….Yessss???’
‘So you don’t want to put it into a savings account?’
‘No. If I did I would have done so. Please would you just put it into the account.’

Pause as she turns it over a few times.

‘Can I ask you what it’s for?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, where did it come from?’
‘I’m not going to answer that. Why do you want to know?’
‘It’s something we have to ask.’
‘Well, I’m not going to tell you.’

End of conversation, counterfoil gets stamped, something (??) is written on the back of the cheque and home I come.

Now let me make this clear. This was a business cheque from a top financial organisation made payable to me and my husband being paid into our joint account. It wasn’t used fivers in a scruffy envelope that I wanted swapped for tenners.

The trouble is I was so surprised that it wasn’t ‘til I got home that the full audacity of this conversation hit me. If it is bank policy to cross examine their customers in this manner then it’s outrageous. If it was just the cashier being officious then she should be disciplined.

Don’t know what to do now – feels like it’s too late to make a protest; so I’ll probably do nothing.

However I’m expecting to have to do another similar transaction soon. I’ll go to the same branch, hopefully get the same cashier and see what happens!

Censored!!!!!

Why doesn't blogger like some of my photos????? After all, although I'm not anywhere near to being a Patrick Lichfield or a David Bailey, they're not too bad. Their usually not pornographic (well, not intentionally) or offensive to anyone who's likely to be offended (well, not intentionally) so why is blogger so bloody picky about what it lets me publish.

I really, really wanted to show you all a picture of something that I saw recently. You'll just have to wait.

Warning, warning!!!!!!!

As I sit here pretending to be doing something really important but in reality putting off the moment when I'll have to start on the everyday mundane things that I don't want to do, I hear in the distance, among the birdsong and the melodious hum from the M25 traffic, the sound of a siren.

This siren, which is similar in tone to those that were used to warn of enemy bombing during the second world war (and I know 'cos I was there!), has been sounding at infrequent intermittent intervals over the past 30/40 years.

At first I seem to remember someone had a theory that it was kept in the grounds of Botley's Mansion, a local institution, and was used to alert people if and when someone escaped. That can't be right because that institution is long gone and been replaced by another called Electronic Arts and I'm sure their inmates don't want to escape (or do you know better, Jo?)

I wonder if it's kept there (wherever 'there' is) just in case and it has to be tested now and again so that it would be sure of working in time of need. Should we be building one of these?? **

Or perhaps, deep in the Surrey woods, there's a unit of forgotten soldiers who think the war's still on. No, with Heathrow very nearby we'd be hearing it every 5 minutes if that was the case.

Or, and this is my favourite theory, it's a special government department fighting alien invasion in this part of Surrey and the siren sounds on the approach of their spaceships, thereby frightening them off. However some have got through. I've seen them. **
I do believe that miniature versions are also living in South Wales.

I must say that no-one in the vicinity seems to take a blind bit of notice when it goes off. The roads aren't gridlocked with people trying to evacuate the area, shops aren't boarded up or anything so I go with the flow and ignore it like everybody else.

One day I'll find out what it's all about. In the meantime, don't forget -

CARELESS TALK COSTS LIVES!!

...so keep it to yourselves

** No photos available - they've been censored by Big Blogger

PS What does the phrase a blind bit of notice mean, by the way? Makes no sense at all.

Rebel without much of a cause

I caught my husband misbehaving this morning. In an act of unprecedented defiance and as a stand against the 'nanny' state, he was cutting a dotted line on an envelope which was quite clearly marked "do not open here, you may be able to use this envelope again", the polar opposite of "tear across the dotted line". We had received a pre-ransom demand from our gas/electricity supplier, you know the kind of thing - the customer does their job for them by reading their own meters (thereby freeing up staff who can knock on doors or stand in your way in supermarkets conning old men and ladies), sends off or emails the form so that they can work out how much you owe, double it, add a bit depending on what the date is and then mug your bank account by increasing your monthly direct debit! He said that he opened the envelope in an illegal manner because we always email our readings and, anyway, there's always another return envelope inside.

Hoping to stamp out this rebellious attitude (perhaps he was hoping it would make him look a bit like James Dean?) I threatened to report him to the 'envelope police'. Quick as a flash he responded by reminding me that I often put envelopes in the blue paper-recycling bags when it is printed quite clearly in a large, bold font that this is unacceptable. Well that stopped me in my tracks, I'd been caught out!!

We came to an agreement - he's going to continue opening envelopes however he damn well pleases and I'm going to put envelopes in the recycling bag whenever the mood takes me. So there! We live on the edge in this house, we do.

Obituary

Something I read yesterday:

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year- old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a Band Aid to a student - but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband, churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do.........nothing.

Bottoms up!!!

When I was trekking through the car park at Tesco's this morning I thought of a witty and amusing post I could do about low slung jeans, fat bums and tums, mediaeval torture and healthy eating. I've just sat for 20 minutes trying to remember all the witticisms and cryptic thoughts that were going through my head this morning only to find that everything I write sounds banal and stupid (nothing new there then). It'll be a miracle if this paragraph makes it to the published page!

I have never understood how men with beer bellies keep their trousers up; I suppose they're just hooked up on their bums.

Snippet of conversation overheard in said car park: He, "Well I was only following you." She, "Yeah, that's what I mean. How could you be following me? I'm behind you."

I hate Tesco's. I only went there because I wanted a cheap radio and the car valeted. As it happened they only had four radios in stock and only one of those was priced so I ended up going into Curry's, which I hate even more. Curry's staff are great at talking among themselves but not so good at serving customers so I came out of there, once more vowing never to darken their shopfloor again! The happy ending is that I got a great dab radio in Argos which cost me almost nothing because I used my Nectar points. Hooray!!!

Ship-wrecked

It has recently been announced that, after 18 and-a-half years, Kirsty Young is to take over from Sue Lawley as presenter of Desert Island Discs, a long-running (64 years) BBC Radio 4 programme.

It's got me thinking about what I would choose to take to my desert island which must consist of 8 discs, 1 book (excluding the Bible & the works of Shakespeare which are already present on the island, together, I imagine, with the means to play your choice of music) and one luxury item which must be inanimate and have no practical use.

OK - here goes, in no particular order:

1. Toccata & Fugue in D monor (Bach) by Jacques Loussier - Bach and jazz together - great!!
2. Beale St. Blues by Ottilie Patterson and the Chris Barber Band - oh, those heady days of my teens, smoky trad. jazz clubs, Bohemians, rebellion!!!
3. Don't Stop Me Now by Queen - much better than Bohemian Rhapsody.
4. Winter from the Four Seasons (Vivaldi) by Nigel Kennedy - imagine relaxing on a sun-drenched beach listening to Vivaldi. (I would like the other 3 as well but I have too many alternatives to fit in).
5. Hot Stuff by Donna Summer - this one always reminds me of when I was super-fit (a few years ago now, think Jane Fonda). Aerobics classes several times a week and an excercise routine to this number. Even now I hear it and can remember the moves!! (think The Full Monty).
6. I Believe by Frankie Laine - one of the first records I ever bought. My parent had bought a radiogram which played about 6 single records at a time, great big heavy 12" plastic things, so off I went and stocked up with Frankie, Johnnie Ray, Guy Mitchell, Rosemay Clooney, Jo Stafford, Kay Starr, etc. I seem to remember that when you were bored with the songs you could gently heat the records in the oven an turn them into ornamental bowls or dishes!!!!!
7. Gilbert & Sullivan's Pirates of Penzance. If I HAVE to choose one song then it would have to be When a Felon's Not Engaged in his Employment by d'Oyley Carte, of course - have loved Gilbert & Sullivan ever since Peter, when a lad, visited an astronomy society in the City of London so I'd take him there in the afternoon and afterwards we'd go along to the Savoy Theatre, home to d'Oyley Carte.
8. Could It Be Magic by Barry Manilow - I make no apologies for this - it's my choice, I'm on a desert island so there's nobody to criticise!! So there!!

Book: This one's difficult, there are so many.................... well it has to be
Outdoor Survival Handbook: The Classic Indispensable Guide to Surviving the Outdoors by Ray Mears

Luxury item: Full set of makeup please - well, when Johnny Depp comes to rescue me I don't want him to mistake me for Davy Jones.

PS I was going to illustrate this post but BLOGGER WON'T LET ME #*!$£*

The Planet Sweet

MaryB has had a bad hair day, Liz has been feeling depressed, Jo is fed up, I'm still a bit in the Doldrums. What's it all about??

At the weekend an acquaintance told me that there is a general air of discontent around at the moment because Mars is nearer to Earth than it's been for some time. As I said, well, look on the bright side, everyone. Soon the Sun'll be in Saturn, Mars'll be in Uranus and, astrologically speaking, everyone will be laughing.

PS Apologies to Mrs Swabb (Habeas Corpus by Alan Bennett)

Happiness is..............

According to Thomas at lunchtime (whilst eating chocolate cake & drinking hot chocolate):

Chocolate
A huge bagful of Lego (bought in the charity shop with his own money)
and

A Family who loves him. Aaahhhhhh.... (it's not often that my grandson comes over all cute and sentimental!)

Time Travel

I've just noticed..........

On the 'Blogger Dashboard' page their Latest News is dated 7th August 2003. Is that really when they last had some news? Have they got their calendar set wrongly? Have I travelled back in time? Have all of the horrible things that have happended in the last 3 years not happened yet? Have all of the good things that happened not happened? Am I three years younger than I thought I was? Is this a chance to start again?

Dog-eared

Bunny Dog

One Dog in a Boat

Sheep Dog (back view)

I'm afraid these photos aren't all that good - it was the end of the event, everyone was packing up and the damn dogs wouldn't keep still!! Nonetheless, they confirm the fact that some dog-owners (present company excepted) are BONKERS.

Boo hoo

Today I'm really fed-up and depressed. Trivial things first:

1. Thomas doesn't much like the summer playscheme he's at this week (or bits of it) so has been
coming home unhappy most days. Still only today and tomorrow to go and then he can be
home with me complaining that he's 'bored'. Will have to think of some interesting things to
do.
2. I was persuaded by the optician on Monday to try contact lenses. I have now had two lessons
on how to put them in and take them out. First lesson I could take them out but not put
them in, second lesson I could put them in but not take them out. Supposed to be going back
tomorrow but still have very red, sore eyes so I think I'll wait awhile.

Now the non-trivial things:

1. Yesterday I called into our little post office around the corner and was treated to a display
of violent, foul-mouthed yobishness by two youths being served before me. Whilst they
were not threatening anyone directly, only discussing the way they lived their lives in
general, I felt scared and vulnerable and I'm sure that the poor man serving them did too.
The sad part is that for them this was a perfectly normal conversation and if anyone had
objected it would have been perfectly normal to have reacted in what they would have
considered an appropriate manner, i.e. violently.
2. Today Jo is supposed to be going to Geneva for a long weekend break. However, due to the
terrorist alert it's possible that she may not be able to go. She has been looking forward to
this trip very much. On the one hand I am disappointed for her if she can't go but a part of
me doesn't really WANT her to go given the current situation.

I could go on and on about wars people don't want, etc.
I'm angry that people have to have these feelings of fear, frustration and anxiety.
I want to live the rest of my life without feeling threatened and intimidated.
I don't know how that's going to be achieved.

.....................................................................................................................................................................

I started this post yesterday but didn't publish it, thinking I'd wait, see how I feel today then either delete it, change it or go ahead. Yesterday, because of the mood I was in, I seemed to notice and take to heart all the impatience, discourtesy, disrespect and unfriendliness that seems to be around these days. It's always there but usually I try to remain friendly and polite myself, accept others for what they are and get on with it.

Today I feel a bit better.
Thomas isn't going to the playscheme (my decision, but with his full approval!).
We're going to spend some time today planning some days out for next week.
Jo is booked on an early flight to Geneva on Sunday (she would still have 2 full days away) but is going to spend the next 2 days trying to bring that forward if possible.
I've cancelled my appointment with the contact lens professors.
We'll probably go out for lunch.
If I start to feel low then I'll just imagine myself a bit younger and think of Johnny Depp. (I was going to put a picture here but Blogger won't do it!)

PS Is it a requirement for all rail ticket clerks to be surly and miserable? because the always seem to be. One of the lighter moments of my day, yesterday: I went to buy a railcard in preparation for next week's outings. After that transaction was completed, me being polite and speaking in full sentences, he answering in grunts, if at all, I noticed that the name on his badge was Roy Rogers. I was sorely tempted to ask after Trigger but thought I'd better not push my luck!!

yum, yum.....pigs' cheeks

Apparently, some once-common British dishes are disappearing from our menus. Here are some of them; see if you can figure out why this should be:

Bath Chaps (nothing to do with pool lifeguards or cowboys' trousers) - this West Country dish consists of pickled pigs' cheeks soaked in water, boiled and rolled in breadcrumbs to be eaten cold, like ham.

Bedfordshire Clanger - originally for farmworkers, made from a roll of suet pastry filled with cheap cuts of meat at one end and fruit at the other. Sounds similar to a Cornish Pasty which these days just consists of meat & potato but for the now almost extinct Cornish tin-miners would also have a sweet filling at one end.

Jugged Hare - made from a sauce featuring port and hare's blood.

Squirrel Casserole - speaks for itself, really.




Brawn - no not this sort! - but a jellied pigs' head.



Calf's foot jelly - chop the feet off of baby cows, boil them up to extract the natural gelatin and there you have it - a once polular food for invalids.

Up in Scotland there was Crappit heids - boiled haddock heads stuffed with oatmeal, suet & onions.

And for the Welsh Griwel blawd ceirch - oatmeal mixed with gruel.

After all of these delicious and nutritious savoury dishes you could delight your palate with:

Junket a dish of sweetened milk with rennet, served with sugar & cream.

Sussex Pond Pudding - (looks very scrummy), a whole lemon in golden buttery sugar syrup encased in a suet crust. Mmmmmm.........

Kentish Pudding Pie - sweet rice pudding with a pastry top

Dorset dumplings - apples served with suet.

I'm off now to make my jam sandwich.

You ARE the weakest link.....

Having an eye test isn't the same as having a maths test or something similar, is it? Giving a wrong answer to the multiple (well 2) choice questions 'can you see the letter Y more clearly with lens a or lens b?' won't mean that everyone will think you're a dummy, will it? Every couple of years I sit in that Mastermind- style chair with these scary multi-lens spectacles welded to my face (that's not me in the picture, by the way; I'm much better looking) and worry that I'm giving the wrong answers to the questions about the eye charts. How can the answers be wrong, for goodness' sake?!! Either one image is more blurred than the other or it isn't, I don't even have to guess. Never again will I shout at someone on Who Wants to be a Millionaire; after all, they have to choose from FOUR options.

Hopefully, as long as I've given the right answers, I'll soon be able to see clearly.

Everything stops for tea.......and biscuits

I was going to have a lovely picture of ginger biccies her but Blogger won't let me!

Anyway, so about ginger biscuits, or even biscuits in general..... you know on the packets there's a row of little arrows and it says 'tear here'??? Well has ANYONE ever opened their biscuits successfully using this method or do you, like me, resort to attacking the package with a carving knife so that the poor little imprisoned biscuits can gain their freedom momentarily before they're gobbled up.

For various reasons totally beyond my control it took me rather a long time to produce my previous post today so, half way through this afternoon, I succumbed to the temptation of a cup of tea and some stem ginger biscuits. By the time the packaging was dealt with, the crumbs swept from the floor and a plaster put on my finger, the tea was cold and not entirely tempting! Serves me right for eating biscuits, I suppose.

Job Well Done

At last......books all sorted, recorded in notebook, those not wanted taken to car boot sale and a lot of them sold (hooray) so now left with two shelves of books that I haven't read yet and the remaining shelves still overflowing. Then I went shopping a couple of days ago, into a bookshop (of course) and came out with 4 books, one of which my husband says we've read. Still, I acquired it with a 'three for the price of two' offer so that can be the free one. The notebook is very large and doesn't fit into my bag so I'm still relying on my very unreliable memory.

As well as a good quantity of mundane easily forgettable books, here are a few that went:

Mary Wesley - most of her books. Read and enjoyed but no urge to keep any longer

Jasper Fforde - The Eyre Affair and Well of Lost Plots. I bought these because they had good reviews but was unable to readeither of them beyond the first couple of chapters


Hilary Mantel - Beyond Black. She recently won a prize for this. I found it readable but once only.


Louis de Bernieres - Captain Corelli's Mandolin and others. Again, enjoyed very much some years ago but have decided now is the time for them to go


Lauren Bacall - By Myself and Then Some Entertaining but won't read again



REPRIEVED: ( **Not yet read)

2 Far Side books by Gary Larson
3 David Niven books
3 Simon Brett books
Plague Dogs by Richard Adams
Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil by John Berendt **
All of Mark Billingham's
Several by Lee Child
Lots by Harlan Coben
Similar amount by Robert Crais
Lots and lots by Michael Connelly
Garden of Beasts by Jeffrey Deaver **
Several by Lindsey Davis
To Serve Them All My Days by RF Delderfield
A Horsemand Riding By (Trilogy) by RF Delderfield
Human Traces by Sebastian Faulks **
Lots by Robert Goddard
All of Sue Grafton's Alphabet series so far (A-R)
Some by Tami Hoag
Chocolat by Joanne Harris
Gentlemen and Players by Joanne Harris **
Pompeii by Robert Harris
Lots by James Herbert
Loads by Dean Koontz & Dean R Koontz
Velocity by Dean Koontz **
Several by Dennis Lehane
All of Alexander McCall Smith
The Distant Echo by Val McDermid
Enduring Love by Ian McEwan
Atonement by Ian McEwan
Attila by William Napier **
I Didn't Get Where I am Today by David Nobbs **
Man and Boy by Tony Parsons
Man and Wife by Tony Parsons
The Family Way by Tony Parsons **
Lots by John Sandford
Daughter of Time by Josephine Tey
Hotel Honolulu by Paul Theroux
Old London Bridge by Patricia Pierce **
Krakatoa by Simon Winchester **
The Meaning of Everything by Simon Winchester
The Surgeon of Crowthorne by Simon Winchester
Queen Elizabeth I by JE Neale **
Dickens
Agatha Christie
Lots of others, etc., etc.

Books I bought the other day:

Panic by Jeff Abbott
Catch Me When I Fall by Nicci French
In a True Light by John Harvey
The Pure in Heart by Susan Hill

Bathroom Blues

OK - so I didn't catalogue my library yesterday; I was FORCED to go and play Top Golf instead! But I'm going to do it today, as soon as I'm over my bad mood.

"But why are you in a bad mood? it's not like you", I hear you say. Well.....................................

I've been cleaning the bathroom, not just a quick wipe round with a spray and a J Cloth but a 'proper' clean; you know, arm down the lavatory bowl up to the elbow as if you're training to be a vet to scrub the little crevices with a toothbrush, down on hands and knees to scrub all of the little crevices in the shower door with a toothbrush as if you're new recruit doing jankers. (I would like to point out here that the toothbrush I use is NOT the one with which I clean my teeth).

Hey ho, so nothing changes and now it's out of the way I can get down to doing good things, like sorting my books, posting to my blog, having strawberries from the farm for my lunch and generally doing just whatever I feel like doing. Suddenly the cloud has lifted and I feel much better so I won't think about the ironing (too hot), gardening (too hot), shopping for food (too hot, so I'll dive into the freezer instead).

Thank you for listening. Perhaps I should get one of these:

Book Ends

Today, I'm going to catalogue my library. Wow, I hear you say (except for family members or those who know me), she must be rich and live in a big house. SO,........ in other words, I'm going to sort out the bookshelves in the dining room. This is for a number of reasons:

1. They are overflowing

2. Books I haven't yet read are getting muddled up with books that I
have read

3. We (Peter, Jo and I) are planning to 'do' a car boot sale very soon so I can dispose of stuff that I know I'll never read again

4. I want to make a written record that I can carry around with me so that when I'm in a bookshop and my mind goes blank when it's trying to grapple with the serious problem of deciding which writers I like, my aide memoir will be handy

5. Likewise, when I'm in a bookshop, etc. and I can't remember whether or not I've already purchased a book I like the look of, out will come my list to tell me all I need to know

Later on, or perhaps tomorrow, I'll report back on what I've kept (because I'll read them again), what I've kept (because I can't bear to get rid of them for some reason), those that I haven't read yet (in case anyone has any comments) and possibly some that are to find a new home.

I now have a large pad and a couple of pencils at the ready so off I go. Tootle pip!!

Catchup

It's now been 2 months since I've written anything!!! (although I have been keeping up to date by reading everybody's stuff and even commenting at times). Not because I don't want to stay in touch and I still love you all dearly. It's just that I've been so, so BUSY.

1. Very involved with Peter's fantastic production of Habeas Corpus
2. Went on holiday for 2 weeks
3. Still involved with sorting out my late mother-in-law's affairs
4. Trying to catch up on a multitude of things like....(cover your ears!)....housework, etc.
5. Spending hours lazing by the pool, sipping iced drinks, waited on hand & foot by hunky
firemen (see MaryB's post )
6. Starting to get involved in TWO more plays with Ottershaw Players (but one of them
includes a naked man and I'm really looking forward to measuring him in my role of
'wardrobe'
7. Have had to go to the pub a lot
8. It's been very, very hot
9. Have been playing games on www.pogo.com and think I now have a serious addiction
10. My brain's been frazzled by the heat & I can't think of anything to write about

One of the above is untrue; can you guess which one, children? Here's a clue: